Grownup Gripe: Sure there are bad apples but let me tell you they don’t fall far from the tree!
You teach people how to treat you and we teach our own how to treat others. Period.
Maybe you don’t know how to treat others or maybe you do, whatever it is more than likely our little spawn are going to follow suit.
Kids are a receipt of us good AND bad. They soak up every single little thing we do and say.
They also soak up every circumstance they’re in; it’s the age old nurture versus nature debate meets let’s a call spade a spade.
As my kids get into their school years it’s been an interesting (and mind-blowing!!!) dynamic to see as they put all of these things in motion.
They definitely are our Mini-Me’s!
Understandably children have minds of their own and each of their personalities will differ but don’t kid yourself for a second they’re us.
Maybe they’ll have more the demeanor of your mother or your partner’s sibling and maybe they don’t even look like you-at the end of the day their little sponges-monkey do-monkey see.
The fact of the matter is they turn into us in many ways (have you noticed doing things your parents did you never thought you would?🤦♀️) but you can still rock their foundation.
Outside my daughters preschool read a sign what you tell your child becomes their inner voice and it’s so true. What do you tell them?
By now I believe we all know how much influence we have over them but it’s not just in characteristics they pick up, it’s in everything.
They’ll be able to conquer anything with 1 thing.
If there’s only one teachable moment with your kiddo it should be teaching confidence. That’s it.
This was the best thing Mama (and my Dad) taught us and they learned it from their folks.
Either you’ve got it or you don’t and if you don’t fake it until you make it. They’ll absorb it all.
Tell them they’re brave or they’re amazing or whatever but if you don’t not many others will.
The more you tell them the better. Just drill it in!
Life is full of ups and downs but it’s how we handle the downs when all is said and done which separates the cream from the top.
With confidence bouncing back is inevitable.
Onto the next!
In addition to confidence you’re probably thinking yeah whatever but you’d be blown over at all the basic skills kids lack this day and age.
If you’ve got little ones you know, it’s unbelievable. Here are 5 common sense things we need to ensure our kids are doing on the daily.
5 Life Basics Kids Need to Know
FirstImpressions are Important
They say within seconds of an introduction people already sized us up so don’t give these kids or anyone for that matter any more ammunition. First introductions are a fact of life and will never cease no matter how old we get or how far we go so the better you can make it out of the gate the less work you have to do in the long run. There’s nothing worse than a wet fish handshake. Teach your kid how to be firm. It’ll pay off in dividends.
Say Please and Thank You
Yes I know this is pretty basic but you would be amazed at the lack of manners kids show nowadays. Definitely not the majority but there’s a small minority who say please and thank you and let me tell you it does not go unnoticed.
Look People in the Eye
If you have a teenager you probably know this one well so that is why the earlier you can and green this in their little head the better. When someone is talking to you look them in the eyes. It doesn’t sound that hard but it is. If that’s a problem for your kids tell them to look at their forehead or their nose or whatever it is but make eye contact at least once with whom you’re talking to. Acknowledge there desire to engage.
Sharing is Caring
Whether it’s food, clothing, your markers, whatever it is if you have more than one and someone is without nearby be sure to at least offer them some thing. Particularly when you are at your own house or have all your things, the more you share the happier you all will be.
Nobody likes a liar or a cheater. Especially when kids are younger they don’t understand the impact these actions really have but the earlier you can decipher what’s right and what’s wrong for them the faster they can figure it out too. All we have is our word at the end of the day. Amen!
Yes these are called manners I know and you’d think we already have been there and done that.
The problem is these kids run the roosts these days and we’ve got the tail wagging the dog.
Check these runts immediately and teach them how to treat you (AND others) with respect asap.
Not only will you feel more appreciated but you get more bees with honey in real life. Right?!?
Grownup Gripe: You can’t go anywhere these days without seeing everyone’s head buried in a handheld device, EVEN the littlest of children.
What the hell happened to plain being bored?
Sure when we were little we had limited options but this helped us be more creative in the end.
We know bored, like we REALLY know bored.
Kids these days that say they have nothing to do while incessantly scrolling haven’t got a clue.
If we weren’t worried about child screen time BEFORE COVID, we definitely should be now.
When the Pandemic hit we had no choice but to occupy some, not all (though it felt that way at times) of our kid’s downtime with electronics.
This never ending screen time has the potential serious impacts on the adolescence of today.
A new Stanford study concluded our kids will experience a HUGE withdrawal from the sheer amount of instant gratification they received during the last year of their incessant scrolling.
Furthermore after being subjected to so much online reward there will be consequences yet still unsure of the TOTAL impact this will have.
So how can we help our kids break their electronics addictions after their handheld computers have become such a main stay?
It won’t be easy depending on the ages of your kids-I don’t have teenagers yet?-but for littles it’s all in how you sell it and making it fun.
Just in time for summer!
Trust me if you get involved even if just for a few I guarantee they’ll love it no matter what.
And if there was a game you really loved as a kid I promise you’ll even sincerely get into it as soon as you start. It will bring you back to your youth!
Here are some of my old favs and some my kids have seen on YouTube 🤦♀️ that occupy hours!
Hope you and yours enjoy as much as we do!
20 Old-School Kids Games that DON’T Involve a Screen
Do it outside/inside and just throw things in a line that they can jump over, go under, swing from, you name it the sky is the limit here.
Depending on the ages of your kids hide like 20 items and go make them find them. Especially if you have older kids this couldn’t be a more awesome activity for you to get a break for a bit.
Hide and Seek
Admittedly this is one they love to play with you but again take your phone, YES we all have addictions too (read more about yours here) and get yourself a break in a dark closet. Hint make it comfortable for yourself – the better the hiding space the longer you’re on your own.
Heads Up 7 Up
OK if you don’t remember being a kid and playing this in your classroom and sneaking peaks at kids gym shoes so you knew who it was, we’re not cut from the same cloth. Here’s how to play. This is my little one’s favorite.
If you’re old-school like me you still have your old boombox but if you must you may use a screen for this you can teach old dances and songs (if you’ve got two left feet like me🤣). No matter what the kids love seeing you dance and it’s a great way to get their energy out.
This was my mama‘s favorites (in addition to Jacks-see below) and all you need is some good dark asphalt and a piece of chalk or tape on carpet. Make your hopscotch course and start jumping! Not only is this great exercise it’s also good for their hand and eye coordination.
Admittedly when I just wrote that I remembered Jack’s and didn’t think they’d be around anymore but I just easily found them on a Google search here at Target. I’m going to buy some for my kids now, you don’t have to this is not one of my affiliates but again great for hand and I coordination and I bet the little kids’ll love it.
Tic, tac, toe and rock, paper scissors
These are easy go-tos especially while traveling because all you need are your hands or some paper and a writing utensil to be entertained. These easy games are good activities for siblings.
Build Musical Instruments out of Recycling
Click here to learn how to create the instruments. BONUS: start a band and have them come up with a performance… This is a great one if there are a lot of kiddos over and the parents are trying to buy a little time. Sell it as a performance at the end for all the folks and they’ll be all in.
Write, Direct and Perform a Play
This is another good one for a group but if you sell it to them under the guise of creating a viral YouTube video based on their preparation and performance you’ll get their ears to perk up.
Paper Airplane Wars
Admittedly I didn’t think they would get into this as much as they do. Not only is it fun to design and actually fly something they created from just a piece of paper but once they get them to fly aerodynamically (great math lesson too) they really enjoy the competitive aspect of it as well.
Find some old pillowcases and let them hop away. Obviously good exercise but also so fun.
Build a Fort
Go through your linen closet and pull every huge king sized/large sheet you can find then let them go to town. You may need to provide some instruction but once you show them a few tricks chances are they’ll want to do it themselves.
This can be as simple as throwing pillows on the ground that they have to jump around but if your kid watches any of the YouTube videos that mine do they create visual lava in Photoshop so let your kids take the lead here.
24 Hour “Challenges”
Again ask your kiddo they know all about these things, whether it’s during a sleepover and it’s 24 hours in the bathroom which usually lasts about 24 minutes or 24 hours of not talking, whatever it is they decide on it probably won’t last the whole 24 hours but they’ll have fun trying to “succeed.”
Anything you do with water is a win with kids. Water balloons are a huge hit but also can get dicey if you’ve got kids that play rough but it can be as easy as playing in a sprinkler or a bucket of soap and water along with some rags so they can wash their bike or your car. They 💕 it!
Make a Time Capsule
This is a fun one but you’ll have to remember where you guys bury it which is a bonus if you task them with creating the map of the buried treasure. Make sure you look at what they put in there (no valuables or favorite snugglies) and be sure to get a box that won’t disintegrate but then it’s up to you all what you want to put in there.
I don’t know about you but I loved tag as a kid. If you really want a lot of buy-and get some glow sticks or bracelets/necklaces and wait till it gets dark-this makes it really fun. It also gets them really tired (if there’s good competition there👌.)
There are a million different options now whether you want to put a glove on and dip it into solution or use one of those long wands to get the big long never ending bubbles to really get the kids going. Obviously the younger ones will like this more than the older ones but if you’ve got good bubble solution and good wands, it’s cool!
Grownup Gripe: Sorry boys but the Job of Mom is the hardest (and most thankless) job a lot of times.
Since I could get a worker’s permit I’ve always had a “real” job so I know it’s against the law to not get breaks or meals off during any given shift.
If you’re a parent (or can remember being a parent of little kids) you can’t even catch ONE!!!
Not even ONE! WTF?!?
Literally within a ten minute time frame I hear one of my spawn yelling Mom at least 10 times!
To worsen matters I find the more annoyed I get the more it occurs so you really can’t even win.
Don’t get me wrong adding Mother to my Resume has been such an amazing experience and I’m so thankful for the miracles I’ve been blessed with.
Like every Mom I think they’re the most incredible beings on Earth-I GET a Mother’s love.
Mother’s love is an awesome thing because nobody else will love you like your Mother does.
Sometimes though I don’t see (not personally because believe you and me I correct it 😂) but I don’t always see equal reciprocation or representation from some family units so I want to put out a public service announcement.
Mom needs a break!
SOME needs to be prefaced not all because I know many Moms who are treated like Queens but overall I think our work load is sorely minimized.
Most Moms (understandably not ALL) would give the shirt off our backs for our kids so we need to be sure we’re treated with the SAME respect.
Of course life has its ups and downs and some days will be better than others but if you’re not getting help around the house because it’s “your” job I call BS and abruptly put ‘em ALL to work.
It’s no secret that Moms pick up the majority of the slack around the house even if working F/T.
All too often EVEN IN 2021!!! the bulk of the household duties fall on the Mother’s shoulders regardless of employment status and equality.
Someone like me signed up to work IN the house part-time and inside of the house full-time so of course I get the person at home will do more but that shouldn’t mean you should be walked over.
My old full-time job required a lot of travel so I made the decision to leave Corporate thinking it would be “easier.” Wow was I wrong?
Let’s just say I’ve told my husband many times I’m going back to work full-time because it’s a walk in the park compared to early child care.
Cleaning up after people (even your own) all day and all night can be infuriating without any help, especially if these people are old enough to clean up after themselves – studies say start them early.
If you’re doing everything for your household you need to stop even if that is your “job. Not only the youngest but the oldest and everyone in between in the household should be of SOME assistance.
If you’re shaking your head in disbelief here are some helpful tips to make it happen once and for all!
5 Tips to Make Mom-Life Easier
1. Delegate Minuscule and Big Tasks
It takes an Army and if there’s a partner in the mix you may need to “train” them (see number two) not to mention even your littlest. Everyone can pitch in. You do NOT need to do it all.
Not only do they say these privileged kids we’re raising these days can use some chores to lessen entitlement and to be more understanding of everything it takes to actually run a household.
Whether it’s putting their garbage in the garbage-we have to start somewhere-or taking out the garbage, start enforcing some real rules. Pick some easy things to delegate and enjoy the help.
There will be complaints and bumps in the road during implementation but stick to your guns and it will become something they’ll do without fail.
2. You teach peoplehow to treat you.
If you make it easy for everyone by picking up all their stuff all the time and doing everything else for them for that matter, they’re going to let you.
It’s the human way. If someone is going to make things easy for you all the time it’s hard to pass up. The problem is is it’s not real life-life’s tough.
If you’re not getting everything you’d like from someone make sure they know how you feel. If there’s something they’re doing you’d like to correct, ASK. Don’t assume that know. Tell them.
Stop, tell them what you want done and ensure they do it. It may take multiple reminders and some “training” but it will pay off in dividends.
3. Opinions are like you know what, everyone’s got one!
You know deep down you’d do anything in the best interest of your child and if these busybodies think they can do no wrong chances are they’re living vicariously through you in the moment projecting their own insecurities onto you.
All I will say is consider the source. EVERYBODY has their opinions of parenting in particular (I even hear myself at times with others so I get it LOL) by be sure to take them with a grain of salt.
More often than not though just forget about it, take it for face value – or possibly pull something from it you can use – but don’t dwell on anything, anyone else says. You’ve got this too. Live and learn.
4. Stop Overbooking Yourself
If COVID taught you anything it’s pump the brakes a bit on your schedule. Kids have the rest of their lives for a lot of pressure so sign them up for a few activities but everyday of the week is so 2020. You’re not doing anyone any favors.
Give your kids AND yourself a break! You deserve it. If life in the fast lane is your style, great but if deep down you don’t want to do it, simply start saying “No.” The world will still go on.
5. Beware of Time-Suckers
Whether it’s Social Media, that needy friend or your Mom think of it like Dr. Phil says and if they’re or it is not adding to your emotional bank account (making it better or only sucking away your time and energy unnecessarily) then say no. Start doing checks and balances. You’ll be surprised.
If there are some areas you can free up by not devoting so much time to that particular activity or person just do it! It will feel great, not to mention you’ll be blown away at how much more free time you can now use for YOU and yours.
Time’s of the essence and if you fill your time with more satisfying activities you’ll feel more satisfied and what’s good for Mom is good for all!
Grownup Gripe: Why isn’t everybody getting their COVID shots so we can get this thing over with?
As Tiers open up and shots become available to all it’s astounding there are openings at shot clinics across the US when drug is ready to go.
Trust me I get it, after a decade working for big Pharma I wouldn’t trust ‘em as far as I could throw ‘em either but not when it comes to our safety.
Undoubtedly we’re ALL over this thing but in order to get over it we need to get under it or at least it UNDER CONTROL and we can do that.
It’s at our fingertips or NEEDLE TIPS so why have only half of Americans gotten their COVID shots?
If you want this pandemic to be over it’s a team effort starting with getting vaccinated.
Many people I’ve spoken with have said look at the flu statistics. Sure a lot of people die from the flu every year but that’s why we have a vaccination for the flu. Not everyone takes it since it’s not mandatory so that’s why it still spreads. The same will happen with COVID.
Now we have vaccinations for the coronavirus.
Clinics are wide-open. Supply is plentiful. Go!
For an infinity of reasons there’s a blanket of distrust surrounding these vaccines and/or a lack of access depending on where you live but things have opened up and I can guarantee you there’s nothing to worry about.
Listen years ago when I left after my 1st was born I was going to write a book about big Pharma but Mama Rinaldi (my Mom😍) told me I’d end up in the Hudson River with cement boots and there’s probably some truth to it🤣.
The opioid crisis put a spotlight on questionable pharmaceutical sales practices but because of that there’s NO room for error.
Ask any Pharma Executive about getting a new drug approved and they’ll be the first to tell you to go through all the hoops drug approving Regulators make them go through is nightmarish.
If anyone’s got Pharma by the balls it’s the Regulatory Agencies we have in place to keep us safe, the same people approving these COVID vaccines and every Rx that comes to market.
It’s like oil and water where sales and science meet with the major difference being financial.
These regulatory agencies are government run institutions that do not care at all about profits.
Regulatory agencies involved in COVID Vaccination Approvals protect public health and their purpose is to ensure these drugs we are dosed stay SAFE for public consumption.
For over 15 years I’ve worked in the healthcare industry so I’ve seen a lot and heard a lot. Now I work on the distribution end (Pharmacy) because I’m as skeptical as you but don’t be!
If you’re on the fence about getting a COVID shot or you have a loved one who is, check out these six reasons why you should NOT worry.
6 Reasons to Stop Procrastinating and Get Vaccinating
1.) Vaccinations will END this thing! Why the heck do you think every pharmaceutical company that could threw their hat in the ring? There are still many trying to put out COVID product that hasn’t yet been approved. The two current vaccinations from Maderna and Pfizer have few complications. Distribution has opened up so it’s never been easier. If you don’t do it for you, do it as your civic duty to help end a worldwide pandemic or selfishly to just get this damn thing over with.
2.) Don’t let the recent Johnson & Johnson pull scare you. Unfortunately with a mass incidence rate like this (basically how fast COVID spreads) there’s always a small percentage of error. Take a look at ANY prescription Product Insert (the paper that comes with the prescription) and very few-if ANY-drugs claim 100% efficacy without any side effects. Everything’s got something but the good news definitely outweighs the bad here.
3.) There is NO conspiracy theory. This is not the Apocalypse and we are not being injected with poison or anything else but a disease stopping formula that saves lives. I understand this virus hit us all like a ton of bricks and we’re all trying to make sense of it and no matter how it started, all that matters is how we end it. Just like with polio, mumps and some of these old diseases we don’t hear about anymore, in order to eradicate these mutations we need to vaccinate. If we do not, it doesn’t go away and keeps effecting people.
4.) Please don’t think the Coronavirus is fake news, media hype or whatever. Sure it’s all we heard about for at least a year so I’m sure it made big $$ for a lot of different news outlets and we are all SO OVER IT but talk to any healthcare professional who worked on the front lines and they will have an EARFUL for you that’s for sure. Yes each year many die from the Flu but not on such a scale as this and in such an aggressive way.
5.) You’re hesitant because you feel they approved it these COVID Vaccinations too fast. Yes typically it takes more like 18 months to two years from product submission to get a drug to market so I get there is anxiety that this was done haphazardly. All I will say is this…Eyeballs across the world were involved in this process and there is NO way the Healthcare Professionals involved in this feat would EVER put their reputation not to mention OATH to serve the people on the line.
6.) You’re not going to be forced into nothin’! I hate rules more than anybody☺️ as I learned from the best (Mama). Nobody tells me what to do. I hear you!!! Again if you don’t do it for you, look at it as you’re helping others and showing your appreciation for the amazing country we live in no matter what we’re asked to do. Are you proud to be an American? My guess is yes. Show it!
Drastic times call for drastic measures and that’s what occurred with the COVID vaccines and that’s what needs to occur now. Please just get ‘er done.
Add get a shot to your to do list and knock it out.
We have nothing to worry about and everything to live for because the faster we can rid this freaking thing from all our lives, the faster we can move on living the lives we all remember!
If you are worried about anything post-COVID and want to get on the right track, I can help you!
Grownup Gripe: We’ve lost sight of what’s important in life once these millennials took over so let’s check ourselves.
As another Tax Day comes and goes it reminds me to get back to basics, the basics of life that is. Remember those?
The only two guarantees we have in life are death and taxes which don’t sound very glorious so don’t lose focus on what’s really important in life. What’s your purpose?
This day and age basic is boring but guess what everything and everyone has to start and end somewhere but what’s important is what we do in between. That’s what counts. Are you using your time here wisely?
What’s your destiny?
Divine intervention will present itself periodically along the way whether for good or for bad but what you do with the highs and lows make or break your INNER happiness enabling OR disabling you from your FULL POTENTIAL.
I’ve spent a lot of time the past month talking about physicality but what about spirituality?
At the end of the day you have to look at yourself in the mirror and decide for yourself whether or not you’re following the RIGHT PATH in your life. Are you?!?
The good news if you’re not you’ve still got time.
Sure life may not be what you envisioned for yourself but are you content with who you are today-not yesterday and not tomorrow-but today? Right here, right now.
Happiness is harmonious. Follow your heart’s desire and you’ll truly feel it within. You can do this by marching to the beat of YOUR OWN drum and making things happen.
We’ve all heard happiness comes from within but that’s because you’ll NEVER be happy if you’re looking OUTSIDE yourself for your own self worth. Look inside.
Too much emphasis has been put on superficial garbage with people posting (and us incessantly looking) at the 24/7 constant social media feeds of the filtered BS.
Do you worry about what others think? Are you a people pleaser? Have you put yourself last? Stop it now!
Now more than ever with no choice but to be armed with our phones 24/7, it’s difficult to fulfill ANYthing since we’re always SOOOOO distracted. Put it down for a while.
What’s your life mission? Whether you forgot, are unsure or still finding your way, find focus with these 7 easy life tips we can’t lose sight of in 2021. It’s never too late.
7 Life Reminders
1. What really matters is what’s WITHIN. In the FB/IG fixated world we live in it’s not easy to look past all the smoke and mirrors so be mindful that YOUR VALUE COMES FROM WHO YOU ARE, NOT WHAT YOU DO. Whether you’re at the top of your game or still working toward it remember these fancy houses, cars, diets, clothing, toys, all this shit we see being displayed in our faces non-stop on social media – it’s all superficial! You can’t take it with you. Reprioritize what’s important.
2. Run YOUR race. Do what you were called on to do. You’ll know you’re on the right path if you’re living the life YOU want. You have the ability to do ANYTHING! If you’re setting goals, no matter what they are, and working toward them you’re well on your way to inner peace.
3. Be patient. Slow down. Let things come to you. This instant gratification we’ve become accustomed to isn’t how real life works. We’ve lost our grit giving up too easily when the going gets tough. Remember that’s when the tough get going so stick with whatever it is that makes you tick and eventually it-whatever IT is-will come.
4. Life’s not easy. You’re going to get a lot of curve balls (when you’re able to handle them) along the way. What separates us is how we deal with primarily the hardships we’re dealt. When things are going great it’s easy to wake up with a smile. When shit happens understand that’s life and learn to move on FAST as a lot of things are out of our hands and the faster you can move on the better.
5. Live and let live. Stop worrying about what others are doing. I know this is easier said than done in this swiping and scrolling world we live in but invest more time in YOUR life and less worrying about what others are doing and you’ll find happiness in whatever you’re doing no matter what or who you’re doing it with. #peace
6. Life is not a competition. Listen I’m not going to lie I’m super competitive and it’s gotten me far in my work life and in sports but in life the only person you need to compete with is YOURSELF. Make yourself better by creating goals and completing them. Start small and scale up, it builds confidence. The more confidence you have the more you’ll do in life. It’s that easy. If you’re not confident with who you are I can help you👍.
7. Don’t forget you’re perfect the way you are! Everybody has something and we’re all a work in progress. For those who think they don’t, let me tell you THEY ARE THE WORST!!! How many times are you trying to prove yourself to people who are not even paying attention? They may not even know you’re competing. They’re not worth your time. You don’t have to prove anything to anybody and save your time for those who love and accept you for the awesome person you are.
Grownup Gripe: To filter or to unfilter, that is the question 🤦♀️. For me it’s a no-brainer I live my life unfiltered but I’m definitely not a Kardashian 🤣.
Being in sales for over 15 years it’s amazing people aren’t seeing the wool or should we call it SKIMS being pulled over our eyes. We’re putty in Team Kardashian’s hands since most eat this up.
Hats off to Kris because she’s a great agent/MOMager – TRUE marketing genius but open your eyes people or at the very least keep in mind everything these girls put out is ultra-filtered!!!
Over the years starting with Kim, the Kardashians showed us all how extremely influential filtered images can be leading to millions of copycats trying to emulate every one of them everyday.
Growing up in the good ol’ days where we were taught to be leaders and NOT followers, these social media platforms as of late blow my mind.
I’m old too and really don’t give a shit what anybody thinks yet it often irks me so I CAN’T even imagine what these countless hours of filtered images and videos are doing to our kids.
If you’ve heard the latest, Khloe Kardashian is suing to get “leaked” unfiltered photos supposedly taken by paparazzi on vacay removed-see story.
Whether it’s another publicity stunt or not to get her name in the news again the fact is it worked.
Khloe Kardashian’s unfiltered photo became a top trending Google search this week because everyone is so hungry to see the dirty deets 🤯!
This has been a battle since I was a kid when Cosmo and others were posting “unattainable” beauty to us since all pics were photoshopped or airbrushed but in 2021 it’s on a whole new level.
Even though we all know these photographs are touched up (right?) and have been FOREVER, with the advanced filters these days the sky is the limit.
Do your kids get that? Do YOU?!?
Admittedly I’m still getting my arms around social media as I just joined FB last year and got on Instagram & TikTok to promote my blog in 2021.
Sure it’s a double edge sword as you wouldn’t be reading my posts if it wasn’t for social media😊 so I get it even if it can be frustrating at times!!!
This has never rang truer than now and is only getting worse as technology progresses along with this insatiable need for unattainable perfection.
The impact of social media is 🙌 but be mindful for yourself and ESPECIALLY your loved ones that you shouldn’t believe everything you read or see!
Be true to yourself!
Filters are nice in the fake World Wide Web (we all spend too much time in) but in real life it’s who YOU really are that counts. What matters most is you’re happy with everyday life and can decipher the two.
As Dr. Seuss says “be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those that matter don’t mind.” It’s so true!!!
So keep in mind the filtered photos Khloe Kardashian and her sisters post have a team of experts “perfecting” them and now at the most amateur level this is an option for all so think 🤔.
5 Tips to Remember when Scrolling
1. People are putting out the best of their best oftentimes coupled with filters to make them look even better. They may have taken 20 pics before posting that one! Like Khloe Kardashian‘s rant that got this ball rolling, I mean if someone with all that work done is still using filters what does that tell you? It’s unattainable perfection we need to stop.
2. Stop comparing yourself to others! It’s apples to oranges. Obvi that’s Khloe’s prob, even with all resources at her disposal she’s still not satisfied with what is put out there unless it’s filtered. You might see images and compare your life to others and this is exactly why you shouldn’t do that. It’s unhealthy, unproductive and often times off base.
3. A picture is worth 1000 words and that rings true now more that ever because those thousand words may or may not be apparent until you look closely. Now along with the actual focal point trolls analyze your posts with a fine tooth comb so be leary of EVERYTHING you see in that pic.
4. Perception is reality. Angles, locales, you name it-most pictures these days are so well choreographed that it’s a no-win for vulnerable souls already struggling with real life. The constant barrage of filtered “perfection” will make the strongest weak (if only for a moment). Don’t let it.
5. If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. After a decade of social media resistance I finally gave in and admittedly for as much disappointment there’s equally as much pleasure from seeing old family members and friends who you otherwise wouldn’t have been able to keep in touch with so as long as you can take the good with the bad it’s okay 👍.
Whatever the reason you look through social media and no matter what platform you and your loved ones use, just remember you’re looking at filtered images through rose-colored glasses.
The biggest secret is getting back on the horse after falling off. We’re all human! We’re going to make mistakes. As long as you can get back on track (with delicious meals you look forward to) you will get yourself those after pics you want.
Grownup Gripe: Looks fade, dumb is forever…I learned that from Judge Judy and I it’s so true but still hard to accept especially as we get older 🤦♀️
Admittedly the number one reason I’ve stuck with a keto diet is because of the fast weight loss.
However in addition to a quick and effective diet, a low-carb diet also presents many other healthy additions your body AND mind will benefit from.
My Mom just died of Dementia and I believe her DIET played a HUGE role in her untimely death.
A low-carb approach appealed to me because of the supposed brain health benefits and the Keto diet in particular has been around 100 years to help young people control their epileptic seizures.
A Harvard study backs findings that the Ketogenic diet reduces seizures in children, as much as medication and has possible benefits for other brain disorders such as Parkinson’s disease, Alzheimer’s disease, autism and even brain cancer but much more research needs to be done.
Unfortunately there aren’t many long-term studies to measure the long term side effects of the keto diet but the short term effects of ketosis are no joke and that’s what all the hype is about.
Whether it’s called Atkins, IIFYM, Keto, macros-whatever the trending name is of the season this diet has been around forever because it works!
Some early evidence suggests it may also benefit people with diabetes with blood sugar control.
Keto is no joke!
Before starting any new diet consult with your healthcare professional as I’ve seen studies that question the amount of fiber associated with keto and increased cholesterol levels so be mindful.
Any lifestyle adjustment needs to be weighed out and there are a million options out there for weight loss so go with what works for you.
The hardest thing about a keto diet is it’s a tough diet to maintain long-term because it’s so strict.
In order for it to work you need to stick with the low carbohydrate foods for the weight to stay off.
I’ll be the first to tell you after the second day of vacation I am the first to fall off the wagon and it can be difficult at times to stick with, no lies 😬
As long as I get back on track in a few weeks though I find keto, like any other diet works if you stick with it, at least for me, really well plusI find the foods enjoyable and indulgent but that’s ME.
My final toast to March Macros will document my before and after pictures promised earlier so stay tuned for my next and final Series post (all here).
Talk is cheap but pics are worth 1000 words. in the meantime here is one more 😋 low-carb meal.
Brown short ribs and cook with jalapeños and garlic. Add 1/3 the coconut milk and place in oven at 325 degrees for 2-2.5 hours. Check periodically and add 1/3 more coconut milk one hour in and the rest of the coconut milk to finish.
Cook cauliflower rice according to package and add short ribs and sauce on top of cooked rice.
Add juice from lime and cilantro to finish it off!
Grownup Gripes: There are a lot of cooks in the kitchen at my house but it’s been a good thing.
Luckily it’s not just me that likes to throw down, my husband learned his way around a smoker!
Mastering ribs, chicken wings, pork tenderloin, you name it but as of late, this dish takes the win.
If you’ve ever been to Kansas City you’ve heard of burnt ends. I ate them all the time when pregnant.
Admittedly there’s more technique involved smoking smoking me, that’s why I leave it him.
And on a sidenote if you or someone you know indulged too much while pregnant☺️, see here.
Check out the video see the play-by-play recipe.
KC BBQ BRISKET Burnt Ends
1 6-8 pound brisket point
2-3 Tablespoons of Olive Oil
6 Tablespoons of sf bbq rub (Sniders is so good)
1 cup of Beef Stock
1 cup low-sugar BBQ Sauce
1/4 cup dark brown sugar
Preheat smoker to 225 degrees using wood chips.
Trim up your brisket point by removing any top fat to about 1/4 inch thickness.
Rub brisket with oil and rub all sides of brisket.
Place brisket on smoker, close lid and smoke until internal temp is 165 degrees. This usually takes 6-8 hours, depending on size and thickness of meat.
Put the beef stock in a spritzer and spritz every hour during the initial smoke period.
Once brisket reaches 165 degrees, wrap tightly in butcher paper and return to the smoker. Smoke until internal temp reaches 195 degrees and remove to a cutting board. This step usually takes an additional three hours.
Unwrap from the butcher paper, drain any liquid from the paper into the aluminum pan. Cut the brisket into cubes about 1.5 inches thick.
Place cubes in the pan and toss with the bbq sauce and brown sugar. Do this step quickly so the brisket does not get cold.
Set uncovered pan of brisket ends back into the smoker and close the lid. Smoke at 225 degrees for 1-2 more hours or until burnt ends start to carmelize and are tender.
Remove the burnt ends from the smoker. Pair with deviled eggs and broccoli salad.
Hope you enjoy this mouthwatering Missouri delicacy as much as we do!
GrownupGripe: Saint Patrick’s Day used to be so much fun…what the hell happened just kidding?!?
Growing up, Saint Patty‘s day was by far I one of the most fun holidays, Mama would die her hair red, we drank green beer and ate corned beef.
The only thing I will say was her CB was mushy and not very good🤦♀️ but it’s thought that counts.
Determined to crisp up the brisket, I find if you broil 1-2 mins each side after boiling, it’s so good!
Something I also remember from the good ol’ days was waking up the next morning feeling absolutely awful and bloated…not good at all.
40 years and two kids later, they’re definitely not what they used to be but the good news is I wake up feeling a heck of a lot better now than before.
If you want to start feeling better too, click here.
I never thought I’d be able to say that but it’s true and the Macros Diet is what’s reversing the clock.
Before getting to the CB (corned beef) let me give you a little background behind macronutrients.
Macros for short have been used for years by athletes to perform at their best. Sound good?!?
Who doesn’t want to feel good every day they wake up? If I’m really on a binge I know I feel the complete opposite and you can too with Macros.
Instead of eating a strict low-cal and low-fat diet like we’ve been told for years, this takes that idea and flips it on its’ head. Instead, the focus of the Macros Diet is getting the right amount of protein, carbohydrates, and FAT. These macronutrients are three types of nutrients that provide you with optimal energy.
If weight-loss is your goal, counting macros require more protein than you may be used to but that is what needs more energy to digest and use than carbs and fat PLUS it makes you feel full all the time so you’ll to start to melt.
It’s truly life-changing. Yes there’s a lot to unpack so I will keep it at that but one last caveat is you still can enjoy the foods you love (as long as they fit in your plan) so even if you need to eat some Doritos of for me Nutella everyday, you’ve got to get it in where you can fit it in which for me means less carb intake at meals.
It doesn’t matter WHEN you eat with Macros either, as long as you stay within your numbers you’re all good for those of you who are late-night snackers like me LOL!
So with this in mind, go enjoy this recipe below with a Guinness or whatever you want as long as you get your protein, fat AND carbs in your threshold you’ll wake up on the 18th with the luck of the Irish because that scale will go down.
Low-Carb Corned Beef and Cabbage Reuben Recipe w/Thousand Island Dressing
Corned beef brisket
One head of cabbage
Swiss cheese slices
4 T Mayo
2T Sugar-free ketchup
1.5T Pickle relish
One half lemon, juice
Take brisket out of package, rinse and add to pot with seasoning packet. Add water until it’s covering everything in the pot, up to 1 inch extra.
Cover, pot on the stove and boil, then bring down to a simmer for 2 1/2 to 3 hours. Remove brisket.
In small bowl combine mayo, ketchup, relish and lemon juice mixing until consistency of dressing.
Turn on oven broiler and place brisket on a pan. Be careful but broil each side 1 to 2 mins to crisp.
Pull out and let rest a few mins before carving. Meanwhile scoop out some cabbage and broth into bowl. Add Swiss cheese, microwave 1 min.
Carve brisket (against the grain). Add to cabbage and cheese bowl then drizzle with dressing. 😋
Cook roast in crockpot on low for 8 hours or on high for 6 hours. Preheat oven to 400 degrees and roast cauliflower an hour before you plan on eating. Flip until golden brown. Take meat out of crock pot and add goat cheese to pot, cover. Remove cauliflower and add to bowl.
Add cream and goat cheese to cauliflower, mash with emulsifier/blender then shred meat. Open lid, whisk goat cheese into drippings. Place roast on top of mash with gravy.
Hope you enjoy these easy recipes. Sign up below to get more low-carb recipes like these.
Psst…even if you don’t like goat cheese you can’t even taste it, it just adds a little more flavor.
Grownup Gripe: If you’re saying I’ve got to give up pizza and beer TOO count me out. Life’s too short!
Here’s proof you don’t!
Who doesn’t like pizza?!? Or beer? 😆 Next to bread these are two delicacies most all of us love.
Every Friday night is pretty much pizza night at our house and my favorite recipe is so SIMPLE!
Italian sausage is packed on the bottom to form the crust, it’s so 🤤 you won’t know it’s not there.
And listen I’m from Chicagoland so all I know is the thicker the crust the better but let’s face it-the best part of the pizza is what’s on top-am I right?
Don’t get me wrong, I love a good crust just as much as the next person but if I can still feel like I’m eating pizza weekly AND dropping lbs, I’m in.
If you want to drop pounds while eating amazingly indulgent foods like this, click here.
Play this 1 minute video clip below to see how easy it is to make zero carb keto friendly pizza 🍕
Zero Carb Pizza
One LB of mild or hot ground Italian sausage
3/4 cup of reduced sugar pizza sauce
2 cups of provel (or your fav pizza cheese)
Whatever toppings you want
Directions: Brown sausage, pack it at bottom to form crust. Add pizza sauce, smother with spoon bottom. Add cheese and toppings then place under broiler for about five minutes while closely watching to brown toppings appropriately. Pull out and let set for a few minutes. Enjoy 😉
As for low-carb beer luckily there are a ton of options out there and more coming out monthly.
Stay in ketosis with these drinks!
If you want to keep it simple Michelob ultra or Miller lights are 3 g. of carbs or less but my personal preference is coronas new Premier beer.
If you want to step it up a notch for an additional Carb, Kona brewing Co. out of Hawaii makes an awesome 4 g. carb brew that’s a light blonde ale.
Then of course there are Truly’s or White Claws or the seltzer beers that are all the rage now…
You can pick your poison ☺️ Let’s just say ALL of these beers are tasty 😂 You won’t miss the carbs!
Not many people will tell you to do this while dieting but you want to make it a lifestyle, right?
So if you’re tired of the scale going up, check out this easy diet plan and sign up below to receive all my MarchMacros Recipes to get started ASAP.
Once or if you decide this diet is your jam here are five things to do before you get fully going.
5 Helpful Tips Before Going LOW-CARB
1. Set a calorie goal and macronutrient range for carbs, protein and fat that will work best for you. If you’re not ready to go guns blazing start with a daily calorie allotment that is attainable. You should not be hungry with this diet it’s so satiating so mindless snacking should subside. Use the above mentioned Calculator for this or look for something similar. I find each has their own pros and cons so find one that works for you.
2. With that said (#1), it is still a DIET so chances are it’s going to be a shock to your belly especially if you’ve been overdoing it lately so DRINK TONS OF WATER AND GREEN TEA. It will keep you full.
3. Get low-fat and low-calorie processed products out of your life!!! Macros goes against everything we’ve been told the last few decades. Real butter, heavy whipping cream, bacon, cheese, half and half-you name the culprit, eat it withOUT guilt😋
4. Find a good tracker you love or do it the old fashioned way with a pencil and paper. Calories IN, calories OUT, at the end of the day that’s what counts when it comes to weight loss so you have to keep a gauge on everything passing your lips.
5. Start out with a detox/colon cleanse. I feel this helps lessen the “keto flu” symptoms. I’ll get into this in more detail later in the series but rid your system of as many carbs and toxins beforehand so your ketosis can kick in as quickly as possible.
Swimsuit season is around the corner. Easily and deliciously get ready for it with MARCH MACROS!
After a relapse on the diet I started in January, in search of desperate measures I found a 10-day green juice cleanse that looked promising.
Have you ever done a juice cleanse (or at least thought of doing one, maybe by researching it?)
They come with claims of up to 15 pound weight loss in 10 days along with more energy, clearer skin, and an overall detoxification of your body.
It’s all new territory for me. I have no idea what to expect but nonetheless I’m ready to mix it up!
So here goes…
This particular juice cleanse has a green smoothie recipe for each of the 10 days with varying ingredients supposedly chosen for each stage.
Starting on day one the first disappointment was no coffee. It’s a cleanse so caffeine is off limits and surprisingly replacing it with tea wasn’t bad.
The base is a few handfuls of greens and water blended with fruits, flaxseed, and a little Stevia.
It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out if you’re going to throw a bunch of veggies/fruit in a blender and consume only that weight loss is eminent but these recipes were designed by a Registered Dietitian with nutrient intake in mind.
Knowing this fact made me feel at ease.
After following every recipe to a T, yet adding more water, I was pleasantly surprised with the first sip. Sure it’s not a chocolate malt but doable.
Let’s just say I had very low expectations and it was sweeter than I thought it would be. I got this!
Did you ever go to spring break and see the DBs wearing ‘Save Water, Drink Beer’ T-shirts’?
Well water became my best friend. I didn’t go anywhere without it. When I awoke I drank at least 8 oz and then throughout the whole day.
It’s recommended you drink least 64 oz. a day which may sound easy but when you’re drinking all your other meals it’s a whole lot let me tell you. It filled me up though.
You’re supposed to chew the smoothie because Smith says the nutrients start when they mix with your saliva and I didn’t get that until I had one.
The smoothies are thick enough so even if it sounds gross it gives you the impression of eating something. You also know it’s pure goodness you’re putting in your body.
I wake up at seven and by 11:30, after water, a couple small smoothies and a cup of detox tea I would pop in a hard boiled egg like a TicTac.
Salt is off-limits but let me tell you the egg tasted incredible without it at that point. That’s the next thing I noticed, my taste of everything came back vividly after a few days of smoothies. #tastebuds
Maybe I didn’t take the time to actually savor the foods before but now there are so few to eat that I do. Whatever it is, I love tasting the flavors again.
Additionally my skin started looking better.
1st it dried up which weather helped but by day 5 I got a glow and more importantly a shrink in pores with no zits on the horizon. My skin is bad so this was eye opening.
Best of all, weight fell off!
By day three I was down 5 lbs! Regardless if it’s water weight, it’s definitely motivation to stick with it. Every other day I’d lose another pound.￼
This year I’m approaching 40 and have found it’s not as easy to lose weight as it used to be.
￼I lost 9 lbs!
I haven’t seen weight loss like this for a while.
That in and of itself is enough for me to give the green smoothie cleanse an A+.￼￼￼￼ I can’t stick with it for life but it’s been 5 days since completion and I’ve only put 1 pound back on since eating whole foods again which is ok.
Next week I plan to give it another go.￼￼￼
The saving grace for me are the allowable munchies in which I took full advantage of.
You’re able to snack on peanut butter, unsalted seeds and nuts, hard boiled eggs, apples and vegetables in addition to the smoothie ‘meals’.
As long as you’re busy and keeping up with the water intake you forget about the calorie deficit.
In my opinion if you’ve got a busy week coming up a cleanse is not feasible so time it wisely.
If you want assistance on how to effectively fit this into your daily grind, click here for more.
Check your schedule!
Meals out will be difficult. You also need to be nearby a refrigerator to keep your stash cold.
The biggest challenge I found is the kid’s dinner time and when my husband would eat his food.
Pizza is their favorite and I always grab a piece but not this time ;-). I grabbed a handful of sunflower seeds, drank a smoothie and carried on.
My husband traveled for five days so that helped.
Unsweetened peanut butter, carrots, some sweet peppers and at least two hard-boiled eggs a day were my go-tos and it wasn’t horrible.
I drank tons of tea, the detox tea each morning and different green teas throughout the day. Smith says green tea helps accelerate weight loss but ￼￼I bought decaffeinated to sleep better.
That’s the one thing I found to get worse while on the cleanse than before I started it: my sleep.
At least once during the night I had to wake up and pee from drinking so much during the day and for some reason I was restless at night.
I don’t know if that had anything with the diet as I’m not the best sleeper to begin with but sleep was good before the cleanse started.
The good news is I didn’t go to bed each night too hungry. I actually felt good for sticking to it.
As the newness wore off, it was still doable.
By the end of the ten days by day 9 I felt a bit weak and was tired but I also worked out hard.
In the book it mentions fatigue as a side effect and doesn’t encourage hard workouts during the cleanse but I had the energy so I did it.
Whatever occurs during the detox definitely effected my thinking as well. My thoughts are much clearer and I have a renewed mental sharpness I haven’t had for quite some time.
All things considered, I’d highly recommend it!
If you’re looking for a tried and true way to quick weight loss, a green juice cleanse is the answer!
What if you could cook a meal that tastes better than a restaurant, costs less than $2 and takes less than 5 minutes to make? And if that’s not enough, what about feeding your family of five for less than $10?
NO JOKE! Even if you can’t turn the stove ON, you can turn out a restaurant-quality meal while laughing all the way to the bank!
What a crock? No joke!
With a good old fashioned crockpot? If you don’t have one check it out.
For the price of ONE takeout meal you can have a lifetime of easy meals in your arsenal.
Wow your loved ones once and for all!
To all you horrible cooks out there, here are 12 meals even a chimp could make.
Shopping lists are available with each recipe. Try them out, you’ll never go through another drive-through again.
12 4-ingredient crockpot recipes a chimp could make
1. SPAGHETTI WITH CREAMY PORK SAUSAGE SAUCE
Break up 1 lb of Italian Pork Sausage in the bottom of the crockpot. Top with a jar of your favorite pasta sauce. Mix well and cook on low for 6-8 hours or high for 4 hours.
At the end of cooking add a half pint of heavy whipping cream and mix well to incorporate everything. Either eat like a thick soup or ladle over spaghetti. It’s so creamy you don’t even need cheese but if you can’t get enough, add some shaved Parmesan.
Add 2 pounds of ground beef (use any cut you want, I like 80/20 but you can go leaner) with one 16 ounce jar of salsa (your favorite kind) and 2 packets of taco seasoning.
Mix well to incorporate all the spices and salsa throughout the crockpot. Cook on low for 8 hours or high for 4 hours.
Break the meat up with a whisk (yes you read that right-it minces the meat up) and serve on taco shells or lettuce with your favorite toppings. I use lettuce, cheese, sour cream and salsa. These are the kids’ FAV!
Add 1 lb of 85/15 ground beef along with 3T of chili powder to the crockpot. Mix to incorporate the spices throughout the meat. Add your favorite jar of spaghetti sauce and once again mix well. Pour in your cans of chili beans, give it one last mix and wait.
Cook on low for 8 hours or on high for at 5 hours. Add toppings such as cheddar cheese, sour cream, chopped onions/chives, oyster crackers as desired. So good!
Grownup Gripe: Death and taxes are the only two guarantees in life so hopefully you hit the lottery on BOTH.
No matter how you slice or dice it, at some point we’re all gonna go. But how? We don’t know.
One thing I do know is drowning or burning may beat dying by dementia or at least they’re faster.
Admittedly this is a hard one to write but I want to do it for a variety of reasons-most importantly to shine a light on death by early onset dementia what my Mom died of a few months ago (thankfully).
Wish I could sugarcoat it but there ain’t enough cane in the world to prepare a family for the devastating impacts of ANY deadly diagnosis.
Wouldn’t wish it on worst enemy!
Throughout my childhood, I feel fortunate as we didn’t have any real death in our small family.
Many of my good friends have lost siblings or parents when they were young; I can’t imagine.
When Mama started losing it, at least we were old enough to cope though nonetheless it’s still hard.
Dying by Alzheimer’s or dementia is a long haul of devastating declinations and disappointments.
I have to say Mama Rinaldi’s (as so many called her) death was actually a blessing as she would NEVER have wanted to live like that, EVER!
We don’t know if she really died from COVID (she was on the East Coast where reporting was shoddy at best) but a 💔 from COVID, no doubt.
If you’ve ever been to the psych ward of an institution you’ll know what I’m talking about.
Let’s put it this way and preface it with the fact we felt very lucky to have Mama cared for in a facility at the end of her life but have you seen ‘One flew over the cuckoo‘s nest?’ Think of that.
We spent one Christmas in the local mental institution leading up to her nursing home placement so the nursing home was a step up.
But what a long, strange trip!
Nailing a diagnosis is difficult but with no cure or real treatments it’s ultimately a slow, excruciating demise.
What most people don’t realize though is unlike a Cancer diagnosis that hits you like a Mack Truck, being diagnosed with Alzheimer’s is different.
Do not get me wrong Cancer is horrible too!!! Too many of our loved ones have been affected by the deadly C and I know it’s also truly HORRENDOUS.
I’ve called on pediatric hematologists/oncologists for years as well and my heart stops when I see bald little babes being wheeled around the clinics.
ANY Diagnosis SUCKS
With dementia though right out of the gate it’s hard as hell to get a diagnosis. All of the effective diagnostics aren’t there yet, especially if your loved one isn’t exactly the gold standard of health to begin with (which Mama wasn’t) so good luck.
It pains me to say but we actually thought Mama was faking it at the beginning just to get attention.
It was stupid stuff like she’d be disoriented and get into the wrong car in a parking lot or lose her keys/wallet ALL the freaking time-she hated it.
When driving became a problem for the safety of her and others it marked the beginning of the end.
After countless visits to different Specialists who basically wrote her off, we finally found a Neurolgist able to officially diagnose her.
It was Lewy body dementia (Robin Williams’ fate) which you’d think would be helpful but not at all.
The Neurologist printed out some notes and sent my Dad (who’s worked on a construction site for the last 40 years) on his way to deal with it alone.
Surely info was lost in translation but we were essentially told there’s not much they can do but to schedule a visit back every six months or so which we did religiously until it was hopeless.
Really are you prepared for any diagnosis? NO but without any guidance it’s especially HARD.
The one plus we always would hang onto is at least she was not in pain (until the end when she was so pumped with Morphine she couldn’t hold her head up) but that’s the only “plus” we had.
Understandably there are amazing Doctors out there who go above and beyond but not in our case.
So much progress has been made with so many disease states but more is needed with dementia.
As more and more Baby Boomers start to experience this epidemic it’ll get even better.
For example my fam didn’t even know there was a difference between Alzheimer’s and dementia.
We also didn’t know in addition to losing her mind, every other faculty was going to go too.
So what if you can’t find your keys or forgot where you put your wallet? It’s SO much more.
The best part we weren’t aware of (I’m being sarcastic) is called Sundowners syndrome. It lasts all night and it involves fear, delusion and hallucinations which means NOBODY sleeps.
My Dad had a hell of a time being a caretaker and did it SELFLESSLY for so long, we don’t know how. He couldn’t even take a shower without her trying to escape. Caregivers are true prisoners.
Unless you have $$ and can afford home health care or no $$ so you can qualify for Medicaid, the middle class with commercial insurance has to fork out thousands of dollars out of pocket.
The cheapest nursing home care we could find was $8k a month and it was a shit hole. There are good ones but you’ll shell out $10k per month or more.
Believe it or not, the real nitty-gritty deets I’m trying to spare you as it’s as ugly as ugly can get.
Let’s just say when your Mom forgets who YOU are, now that’s a tough pill to swallow no doubt.
I’ll never forget the day I walked through the door and Dad told her “Maria’s here” and she asked who I was and Dad had to tell her-she had NO CLUE.
Needless to say it was a bat to the knees but par for the course, eventually she “forgot” how to walk, talk, eat-pretty much a vegetable at the end.
If you’re going through this (or unfortunately if you ever have to) here are some resources to give you some kind of direction for when a close family member receives a devastating diagnosis.
Heads start spinning when the prognosis is grim so hopefully this helps with some preparation.
Here are 8 steps to take when your family member gets sick
1. Start with the local CHAPTER
Whatever disease state chances are there’s at least ONE group that is well-versed in the disease and can help you better prepare for what to expect. They have resources for ALL the services, products, you name it-it’s all there. It’s a good starting place to get some much-needed direction.
2. Talk to the Clinic Social Worker
Depending on the size of the clinic/hospital either they’ll have a dedicated social worker for the specialty clinic or the actual hospital will have case managers who can help. They are usually more well-versed with different insurance protocols, financial aid possibilities and of openings, if any, at local care centers. They can help answer many of your questions and have placement ins across the region if/when need be.
3. Research EVERY Rx inthe Class
Ensure you or your loved ones are prescribed the latest and most appropriate drugs for your diagnosis. Maybe you aren’t a doctor but make sure you are educated about all the products and the reason this particular drug was chosen. I say this because maybe the Doctor was sold one particular drug by someone like me even though there are five others on the market. They could’ve also participated in clinical trials and were compensated by a preferred manufacturer who also provides them speaking engagements-whatever but you never know until you know-so for whatever reason learn what drugs are out there and make sure you know ALL the options and more importantly you are given a choice.
4. Figure out your health insurance
Between your hospitalization coverage and prescription benefit plan be sure you negotiate and most importantly keep everything in network to keep costs in check. Even if you do have to fight to do something out of protocol and receive denials-appeal, appeal, appeal. Fight the fight. We joke in pharmaceuticals that Insurance companies make patients and Doctors offices jump through hoops hoping eventually you give up so do not give up. If you can meet the medical criteria of an appeal, you can fight for anything!
5. Properly allocate your $$$
Get your financial house in order (even if it’s a “small” house;-) you still have a footprint and family members involved so save them the headaches, please. Put things in trusts. Do everything you need to do while still able to do so. Medical expenses are the top reason people go bankrupt in the US so be sure you are covered. Speak to someone who knows and can help.
6. Askfor help
Your immediate family members need to step in. It may be hard for you to ask for help, my father never did, but let me tell you especially toward the final days before Mama was admitted his fuse was the size of a millimeter. Anything set him off. My Dad is the HARDEST WORKER I know and this was the MOST thankless, painful job of his life.
7. Be Empathetic
It will get frustrating at times especially at the beginning when your loved one (and all of you) are trying to process their fate and then toward the end when things are REALLY bad. Be mindful in many cases it’s only going to get harder (and worse and these were the cards you all were dealt) as they feed off of you and if you’re always frustrated with the situation, they will be too which below nobody and nothing.
8. Right your wrongs
No matter which side of the fence you’re sitting on once it’s over, it’s over and you don’t want to live a life of would’ve, should’ve or could’ve. Do it now even if it’s hard, suck up your pride and make sure as best you can everything is tied up because you never know when things go south.
If you or someone you know needs help and is going through something similar, click here.
Everyone who knew my Mama, loved her but let’s just say our last visit with her before COVID she could hardly talk and literally only hissed like a cat.
It scared the hell out of my kids, it was sad-they’ll never remember Mama Rinaldi like they should.
Dad told Wes and my brother-in-law to “enjoy em now because they’re (my sis and I) are going to end up just like her 🤦♀️.” Thanks dad but unfortunately there’s probably some truth to it.
I’ve probably got about twenty solids left. That’s actually one of the reasons I do this blog, so my kiddos (and I) have receipts of everything LOL!
We don’t know, it’s the crazy thing about LIFE we never know what’s around the corner but what it shows us is we need to grab the bull by the horns while we STILL CAN and live life without regrets.
Mama always did!
People have asked if she died from COVID and if so, it’s the best thing that could have happened!!!
Dad took her out of her nursing home everyday up until he couldn’t so once he was out of sight, he was out of mind and she died six months later.
So sorry to be a Debbie Downer here as my sister told me last year my Christmas card read like a suicide note but dementia is a devastating disease and a lot of people don’t understand its’ impact.
Like I used to, they think it just happens to the really old, and believe me ignorance is bliss.
We take our health for granted until something happens. Remember at the end of the day it’s the most important aspect to LIVING so keep it up.
To any of you out there dealing with a devastating diagnosis, please know I feel for you and understand how hard it can be often times.
Grownup Gripes: Why has everyone my age turned into Todd and Margot from ‘National Lampoons Christmas Vacation’ when working out, what about good old fashioned push-ups?
Hey, I’m not here to judge, whatever floats your boat is fine with me!!! That’s what this blog is all about. To each their own.
I’m just cheap and won’t pay hundreds (or thousands) of dollars to do something I can pay zero for and get the same outcome.
THE TRICK IS CALORIESIN, CALORIES OUT.
Reports say 80-90% of weight loss comes from what you do or DON’T put in your mouth but when good food choices are combined with exercise you’ll see results.
Admittedly I’m the first to fall off the wagon. It’s something I’ll USE THIS with but it’s also exactly why I know what works.
When you’re barely tall enough to ride the rides at the amusement park and eat like a defensive lineman, pounds can pack on QUICK. Luckily I’m not living a 600 lb life.
WE’RE ALL A WORK IN PROGRESS, RIGHT?
The hardest part is eliminating your bad habits whether it be late-night snacking or soda or sweets but if you start there and add exercise, the pounds are going to drop off.
What theory are you-orange or more orange juice? Again if that’s your jam cool there are a lot of people who want a competitive workout. I personally am all good with the Y.
The problem with me is I can’t find the motivation to go BACK to the gym, especially if I’ve been away from it forever.
Are you the same way? Can you think of a million things you’d rather do? Billion?!?
I start dipping my toe in the water at home in order to ease into it. That way you don’t have to worry about a thing. Here’s how.
Grab dumbbells (I use 10s and 15s). Do these go-to’s in 30-40 mins. No momentum, the slower you do the reps the better.
It’ll be hard at first, you can even break it up into 5 exercises a day (even 4) until you get stronger and comfortable with each move.
Once you’re ready you can head back to the gym (or not). It doesn’t get easier than that!!!
Lose weight without joining a gym: Here are 25 exercises to help you tone up in no time￼
1. High knees
You need to get your heart beating so I like starting with high knees. Stand up tall and bring one knee up to your chest and then the other. The faster you can go the better.
It’s basically running with high knees.
Sometimes it helps to bring your hands up with palms facing the floor so your knees can “high-five” your hands from below.
Essentially your doing shrugs with weights. Stand holding heavy dumbbells in each hand and do shrugs lifting shoulders up and then bringing shoulder blades back bringing elbows together behind your back and your chest out. Let arms drop back down
Repeat shrug like motion for the entire set.
3. Military press
Grab 2 medium-sized dumbbells. Lift above your head from your sides as if you were slowly punching the ceiling and return back to shoulder height. Keep repeating.
4. Skull crusher
Take heavy dumbbell. Use both hands to hold one side. Lift weight above your head and fold your arms back behind your head to drop the weight in a skull crusher motion.
It’s as if you were slowly lowering the weight down the center of your back with other end of the weight. Try your hardest to keep your elbows up next to your ears.
Lying on an exercise ball with arms straight over head make this move even harder. This is supposed to work the triceps.
5. Squat and hold
Just squat and hold for as long as possible. If you want to make it harder, bring feet together or with feet together, stand up on your toes. Make sure your knees are not going over your toes. The lower the better.
6. Bench press
Use heavy dumbbells and you can lay flat on the floor bringing pelvis up off the floor.
Bring weights up and down slowly, meeting in the middle. If want to make it harder, use the exercise ball. 4 counts up, 2 down.
Do them old school, no knees, butt down so your back and legs are in a straight line and bring yourself as low as possible.
Don’t go too fast. That just makes it easier.
8. Lateral Raises
Take lighter weights and hold them straight out in front of you the slowly lower down the weights in unison without bending elbows down to thighs and bring the weights back up keeping arms straight.
You cando the sides when done in front.
Pick 1 or do all 4. Start in push-up position, go down to forearms, then work each side.
10. Love handle whittlers
Do a side plank. Lift your free arm up in a straight line to the ceiling. Push through to the wall behind you sliding your hand under your chest toward the back wall.
Do as many as you can then switch sides.
11. Jumping Jacks
Try and do them as fast as you can, aiming for at least 50 quick jumps in a minute.
Use two heavy dumbbells or weighted bar and lower as close to your shins as possible. Don’t go too far down, you’ll hurt your back and stand back up. Keep repeating.
13. Kettle ball swings
Personally, I don’t use a kettle ball after a neck injury so I use a medium-sized dumbbell in one hand. I start by lowering it through my legs then raising shoulder high swinging through my legs in a kettlebell motion. This is one where momentum works in your favor. Use your hips.
Lay on your belly on a mat. Raise up legs and arms as if you were flying Superman. Hold stretching both arms and legs outward.
15. Wall sit
Stand up with your back against the wall and lower down so you’re “sitting” against the wall without a seat.
Put a weight on your legs if you want.
Hold. To make it even harder, do light weight curls with triceps against the wall.
16. Bench dips
Sit on a bench then use your arms to lower yourself off of it instead of your butt.
Hold yourself up, lower down with your arms and then pull yourself up, like a reverse push up off a bench. Repeat.
Keep legs out straight in front of you.
17. Walk-on ceiling
Go on all fours as if you were crawling and put a weight in between the back of your leg and squeeze it to hold it in place.
Lift your foot up to the sky as if you were walking on the ceiling keeping the weight in place at the same time. Keep repeating.
18. Ab twist with weight
Hold one weight with each of your hands on each side and hold it out in front of you.
Do ab twists to each side bringing the weight AND your body switching sides as quickly and doing as many reps as possible.
19. Lemon squeezers
Basically like half a sit-up. Sit with your upper body and lower body in a v-pose/45 degree angle and bring V together to “squeeze the lemons” and keep repeating.
Lower back down and bring yourself back up without taking breaks in between.
Jump up and then put your arms down in a push-up position and jump your legs back. Pull yourself back up and repeat.
If too hard, just run in place for a minute.
21. Goblet squats
Hold one heavy dumbbell with both hands next to your heart against your chest and do squats where your elbows hit each knee. Don’t let your knees go past your toes.
Do as many as you can keeping good form.
Lay down on your back, bring right elbow to the left knee and then bring both your legs down an inch from the ground and switch sides. Start with one each side, moving up to ten each side. So 1,1,2,2,3,3, etc.
23. Squat jumps
Do a squat and then burst up as far as you can off the ground lowering back down into a squat and keep jumping for 30 secs.
If you can’t do squat jumps, do high knees.
24. Dumbbell curls
Take good-sized dumbells and curl up and down, either with knuckles horizontal or vertical. 4 counts up, 2 down. Keep it slow.
25. Butt kicks
Run in place kicking your butt with each foot as it comes up. Do for at least 30 secs.